Wednesday, April 28, 2010


So unfortunately I didn't return home with a super awesome story to blog about. :(


I've been thinking. (Imagine that!)

My life is super disorganized. It's something I live with everyday, and every few months or so something really shitty happens due to my massive lack of organizational skills and I resolve to fix it. So, I go out, I waste all kinds of money on planners and folders, and I fill them up with everything I could possibly need! And then... I usually never look at them again. YAY for organization!

Mom keeps telling me to make lists. And since Moms have this ridiculously annoying habit of being right all the time (someday I'll figure out how she does it), I've decided to take her advice. I know she'll be proud. :P

The Bitch List

Bitch #947
Red lights.

Bitch #2052
People who walk too slow.

Bitch #146
People who wear boots that look like Sasquatch feet. People who think boots that look like Sasquatch feet are cute. People who wear boots that look like Sasquatch feet in the summertime. People who invented boots that look like Sasquatch feet. People who sell boots that look like Sasquatch feet. Parents who buy Sasquatch feet boots for their kids and let them wear them on any day other than Halloween.

Bitch #322
When someone parks their POS FUBAR car within three feet of mine.

Bitch #780
People who feel they need to warn me about the dangers of smoking, like they weren't already written all over the effin package.

Bitch #1134
Guys who ask girls out and then a) treat said girls like shit after said girl says to said guy "I have a boyfriend." or b) makes said girl feel guilty for saying "I have a boyfriend." when said guy says "It's okay. I know you don't really have a boyfriend. You're just being nice." umm WTF! Are you saying I can't get a boyfriend?

Bitch #402
People who shop at giant nameless retail stores. People who shop at giant nameless retail stores and think I am their personal shopper. People who TRY to shop at giant nameless retail stores through the phone.

Bitch #229
Ordering coffee from a menu that's not written in English while standing in America. Anybody know what the hell a venti is anyway? Don't answer that.

Bitch #555
George Bush. The morons that voted for George Bush. The jerk offs that voted for George Bush twice. The idiots who now deny ever having voted for George Bush (I mean come on guys, he had to have gotten elected somehow).

Bitch #194
People who think Rhode Island is really an island.

Bitch #2011
People who follow me around the college parking lot just so they can be first in line for my parking space. (Jokes on them anyway because I just sit in my car... doing nothing... until they are late for class or leave.)

Bitch #1764
People who think that flicking that little lever on the left hand side of their steering wheel up or down to indicate the direction they're turning in is tantamount to rocket science.

Bitch #648
People who speed past me just so they can beat me to the red light.

Bitch #32

Bitch #117
People who order enough food for a buffet at the Drive-Thru.

Bitch #631
People who stand in the hallway, listening to obnoxiously loud music and playing air guitar, while I try to get my way-more-expensive-than-necessary-education on.

Bitch #900
Vegetarians. (I'm sorry, I'm all for the Humane Society but there's just something inhuman a person who can't enjoy a good steak.)

Bitch #793
People who can't count.

Bitch #1590
iPads. I just don't get it.

Being stuck behind a school bus when you're already late to class.

Bitch #478
People who cut me off just so they can sit in front of me in traffic.

Bitch #265
Somehow we can put a man on the moon, but can't make junk food healthy. w.t.f.

Bitch #9023
People who think that Applebee's is a fancy restaurant. I won't insult anyone here by throwing in the people that think Taco Bell is a fancy restaurant. They probably can't read anyway.

Bitch #87
People who think they are smarter than me.

Bitch #1
People who are smarter than me.